Things that people say...

Since we have become a family with an infant, people seem to think that they can say whatever they want to us when we are out and about. Recently, I had the displeasure of a woman coming up to me in the hair salon and asking me if my daughter "looked like E.T. when she was born". Mind you, this was not a little child saying this to me but a full-grown adult! I was taken aback by this question. So, I replied that I didn't think that she looked like E.T. at all when she was born. She just looked like a baby--a small baby but a baby!

Our daughter's size is always a big deal to people that do not know her. You would think that no one has ever seen a small baby before. I've had people ask me how many weeks old she is (instead of months) and also my personal favorite "how much did she weigh when she was born?" My question is: Why does anyone care or is it just a conversation starter? We also receive tons of comments on her height. Our daughter is very long and skinny. She will probably be taller than both of us and this is a fascination as well. She's tall--enough said!

I find it incredible how many people come over and talk to us now that we have a child. Sometimes, it is a pleasant encounter and sometimes...well, it just is. We have learned to take what people say in stride and not take it personally. My favorite conversations center around the fact that"no one knew that I was pregnant". I get such a kick out of this comment. Sometimes, I just ride it out and other times I respond with "I wasn't". Most people get the hint when I say I wasn't but some look at me as if I have 4 heads and one eye. I also love when people try to figure out who our daughter resembles. So far, the consensus is that she mostly resembles her Dad except for the eyes which are DEFINITELY mine (or so I've been told). Actually, our daughter looks like who she is supposed to--herself and we are fine with that. We don't expect her to look like us and never will :-).

Do I feel that I have to explain how she came to us to everyone that I meet? Absolutely not! As wonderful as adoption is, it is also imperative to remember that our daughter's story is not ours to tell. Sometimes, I have to reveal the truth for
medical purposes. Which does not thrill me simply because HOW she came to us is irrelevant in the big scheme of things. She is our child whether she was born to us in the traditional sense or was born in our hearts.

The other conversation that I get a thrill out of having is the one dealing with the length of my labor. My response is always "Yes. It was a very long labor if you call 3 years and 8 months a long time". Most people have to think twice when I come out with this response. They are usually speechless and drop the conversation.

What else is fun is when we go to any doctor's appointment for our daughter. Because her birth name is different from the ours and from the name that we call her, it becomes confusing when she is called in for her appointments and when talking to any medical professional on the phone about her health. We also find it annoying that despite us telling so called professionals what we call her at home they still call her by her birth name! We are so glad that she isn't old enough to know the difference right now.

Overall, we find that most people are very genuine and are complimentary and that most conversations center more around how beautiful our baby is. For those people who are so genuine, we say "thank you".